Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Dealing with a Crisis

At the beginning of the week during which I made these drawings, I had a fight with my boyfriend.  The parts have a very hard time dealing with conflict, both because their own conflicting viewpoints lead to a ton of issues with inconsistency and because once there is a conflict they don't know how to end it or move on. 

I explained in a previous post about the parts being around at the same time and the problems it can create.  Well, this holds true after an argument as well.  On the first day most of the parts were around and pretty unhappy.  A couple of days later the happy part sort of checked out.  She didn't want to be around anymore because things were too chaotic or maybe the other parts pushed her away to protect her, I'm not sure. 

Four days from the argument, the sad part, crying part, and empty part were the only ones around.  I think this is because they were the only ones who didn't totally go into hiding.  The sad part usually stays around through tough times, perhaps that is her "job" - to take the pain, hurt, and blame of things gone wrong.  Although this seems to be the job of the eraser part as well, but without the feelings of blame - the eraser part usually knows it wasn't her fault.

Luckily, I made it through this crisis.  Hopefully another argument doesn't happen for a while, because helping all the parts process what went on is a nightmare.  They each need to be reassured individually and even though they might all be listening inside, they will each come out and ask questions that concern them and look for answers and comfort. 

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